Heres an update.
After my original install,I thought the relay died...however,it was only overheated apparently.I figured this out over time as I had problems again after putting a new relay in....in fact the car is running on the original relay now after I did another upgrade to the wiring.
I have had a steep learning curve here on this setup,and I wanted to share my findings as I go.
(1)In the original install,I used 14ga wire from the relay to the pump even though AEM states that a min.12Ga should be used in their instructions...my fail here.I didn't think that little difference would matter,and its what I had available at the time.
(2) I grounded the pump to the factory harness like the stock pump and grounded the Relay to a rear strut bolt...however,I only used a 18ga wire here...again. My bad on this.Its just what I had available at the time.
While on a long drive ,I suddenly lost fuel pressure again and was dead on the side of the road.
I noticed the relay was hot and put a jumper on the plug and the car started right up.(it does have less FP when not on the relay,but runs fine)
That got me thinking that the wires are the issue and the relay was overheating from the wires being too small for the AMPS being pulled from this AEM 320 pump
Heres what I have done since to try to remedy the situation...
(1) rewired the power from the relay to the pump with 10 Ga wire instead of 14Ga
(2) replaced the 18Ga ground to the relay with a 10Ga tot he strut bolt.
I re-installed the original relay that I though was dead just to test it and everything is good so far...so the relay was just overheated ,I guess.And it seems like my Re-do has helped...so far.Time will tell,I suppose.
I have ordered another NEW relay to put in just in case the heat damaged this one.I want peace of mind of having a new one..lol
cliff notes,
do it right with bigger wire the first time,dont skimp,and you wont be broke down on the side of the road suddenly from an overheated relay.