I just wrote a much longer reply here but it didn't go thru after I hit submit and it disappeared. First I want to say that I'm going through major changes in my personal life including my living situation and my priorities have shifted a bit. I have not logged on here since last night and don't always have access during the day to the forum. Here's basically what I wrote in the post that didn't go thru:
1) If you want to remove this thread fine but I think the official feedback comment should remain. He is the worst type of buyer you can run into as a seller. He will never be satisfied. It's possible he decided he wanted something else in the 2 week period between when he first sent me half of the payment and when he received it. A form of buyer's remorse, possibly, or maybe he needed new tires, new brakes, who knows? A new window. And now he's trying to keep the item AND receive a full refund via Paypal.
2) There are many more people that agree with SE-RMonkey's opinions than have actually posted. I've spoken w/ other members in private but they have mostly chosen to stay out of it, which I understand. SE-RMonkey is a stand up guy, and he's fair. He's called me out for things in the past he didn't agree with. He's not biased because we know each other. He sees thru the buyers' whole charade, something a whole bunch of you guys do as well but just didn't physically type out
3) In addition to citing "internal damage" and "external damage" Oscar also cited "wrong model" and "wrong size" as the reasons for his Paypal dispute against me, which we KNOW isn't true
4) I had NO REASON to take those photos of the header sitting on my garage floor other than to send to him!
5) He wrote that the header "wasn't to his liking" and I offered him a refund if he sent it back; he refused because he wanted all shipping fees refunded
6) I received several blocked phone calls and hang ups except one with some kind of breathing on the other end, Google traced that to (what I believe is a pay phone) in Ontario, CA. I don't know anyone from there and strangely immediately after I posted about the phone calls they stopped completely
7) I blame myself for the UPS issue, but even more for ignoring the ENORMOUS warning signs about dealing with this guy. Non-stop text messages for 10 minutes straight usually each one ending in "!!!!" and/or "????" sometimes in all capital letters, and then silence for a few hours, and repeat. Paranoia and accusations from the very moment after he first sent me some of the $ on Paypal.
8) If this doesn't tell you there's something up with this guy: he accused me of conspiring with UPS employee(s) to artificially increase the weight of his package in order to benefit by pocketing the $ difference in shipping costs. Seriously..
9) I was informed if I did not send $175 to him by a certain deadline my "time was up" I would "be ruined" I would be "exposed for the thief and scam artist that I am" - basically extortion. At that point I was so sick of dealing with him I just said something like "go for it." Had he been a normal, reasonable person I would have gladly worked something out, but his behavior and conduct made that impossible.
10) I've received several positive feedback ratings since he originally created his thread
11) Never intended or wanted any of this to happen. I said it before, all he had to do was be a normal person and not accusatory from the very beginning. It's one thing to question if someone you don't know is going to send you something, it's another to dream up some sort of scam involving employees of the UPS store to defraud him of a few bucks. If that doesn't tell you something about the guy, I don't know what possibly will. Paranoid personality disorder? Maybe.
12) Where are the "official responses" for other threads where people clearly and legitimately took payments and never sent the items?